To update you on one of the current frustrations - No the air conditioner has not blown up or caught on fire or any of those other dastardly things I have been dreaming about. In fact our wonderful, hearing impaired neighbours have purchased another air conditioner for their lower floor as well! I have a conspiracy theory going on in my head now of course. Who the heck runs two air conditioners twenty or more hours a day and leaves their doors and windows open? Especially now that it is getting cooler out at night. What exactly are they cooling? Bodies? Oh goodness I can’t even go there. Maybe the fridge is broken and they have their food in front of the air conditioners or maybe they have a penguin (personally a huge fan of the penguin idea even though I know deep down inside that not all penguins need to live in cold climates and of course I am going to assume that it is totally illegal to have a penguin. They are just so freakin cute and it’s better than imagining a makeshift morgue taking up shop in the hood!)
Getting seriously sick of the new catch phrase“It is what it is”. Honestly people. Isn’t that just stating the obvious? It wouldn’t be bad if I didn’t have to hear it over and over again! That leads me to wonder if other people notice the repetitive use of the same phrase or is it just me? Am I word or sentence sensitive? I’m gonna guess that I am since I am still NOT going to read the repetitive sentences and descriptors in the other Fifty Shades books even if my pal Scrappy plants them in my car, house or anywhere else for that matter. I WILL NOT READ them (Sam I am). Although the Fifty Shades series have brought me much joy in the sheer fact of just ridiculing them and laughing about the effect they have had on the chicks who have read or are reading them. What the hell, if it’s getting people to read who am I to complain.
The new year has begun (Not losing my mind. Someone screwed up the calendar and made January the beginning of the year instead of September, which is really the start of the year.) School has started. The extreme joy of what appears to be never ending hockey tryouts and of course my personal favourite – my shows are back baby! Although having a break from regular programming has allowed me to expand my television viewing horizons and I am now addicted to Canadian and American Pickers, Pawn Stars, Long Island Medium and almost any show that involves the food network. I am on my way to becoming a very knowledgeable, well rounded (insert snicker here) human with interests in many things. Thank goodness for PVR. What did we do before that? Oh ya, VCR. Ha. Sounds like eight track now doesn’t it?
Speaking of Scrappy – I had the pleasure of being invited to the surprise party her husband put on for her oohhhh lets say 30th birthday. Hell no. Let’s make that 25thbirthday, mostly because the damn chick has more energy than your average six year old. Although I have been told she does not drink caffeine or alcohol, I am convinced she does some kind of illegal, back alley drug to keep up that energy level. I plan to conduct a full investigation and report back. I am not opposed to stalking. (Although I might mention here that the chick WAS walking around with the biggest wine glass I have ever seen with, I am assuming, alcohol in it. Unless she had her husband install a Slurpee machine somewhere in the house. Then my money is on Slurpee!)
So New York and I ditch the kids with New York’s kind husband, Chatty Charlie, and head out only to get to Scrappy’s house and not know a single, solitary person. Notta. Scrappy, who has at some point figured out her husband is putting on a party for her, hasn’t even arrived yet. Apparently she is “shopping”. This in itself is extremely probable as I personally elected Scrappy the Captain of the“Shop Team” last year some time, however, when the chick finally shows up at her own party she is wearing a super sexy dress, sweet new shoes AND her hair is done? I call bull monkey on the supposed shopping trip and I am going to say that girl spent the day at the salon! She looked freaking fabulous (in hindsight I am pretty sure this is the first time I have seen her dressed up because who the hell shows up to lacrosse wearing anything other than jeans or yoga pants) and was, as usual, the life of the party. Note to Scrappy: Lady, I think all that bitching paid off. The house renovations are fantastic and your husband still appears to like you! Win, win sister!
So New York and I ditch the kids with New York’s kind husband, Chatty Charlie, and head out only to get to Scrappy’s house and not know a single, solitary person. Notta. Scrappy, who has at some point figured out her husband is putting on a party for her, hasn’t even arrived yet. Apparently she is “shopping”. This in itself is extremely probable as I personally elected Scrappy the Captain of the“Shop Team” last year some time, however, when the chick finally shows up at her own party she is wearing a super sexy dress, sweet new shoes AND her hair is done? I call bull monkey on the supposed shopping trip and I am going to say that girl spent the day at the salon! She looked freaking fabulous (in hindsight I am pretty sure this is the first time I have seen her dressed up because who the hell shows up to lacrosse wearing anything other than jeans or yoga pants) and was, as usual, the life of the party. Note to Scrappy: Lady, I think all that bitching paid off. The house renovations are fantastic and your husband still appears to like you! Win, win sister!
