Went to aforementioned mall. It was nuts.
Managed to find a parking space quite easily upon arrival but the 1,700 people
who came in after me could not. You would think going to this mall was
like a necessary trip to the emergency room the way people were acting in the
parking lot! There were fist fights and car bumping accidents all to get
your car in a space to shop! Yes, the police had to be called. Many,
many times. The youngest money sucker and I made several trips back to
the vehicle and had fun watching the people stalk us in their cars waiting for
us to leave. (Who in their right mind would follow a little kid to a car
thinking he was done shopping for the day is beyond me! That is how
desperate these people were!) Keep in mind there are
apparently 6,000 parking spots. This, to me, is a staggering amount of
parking spaces. Let’s just assume each car has more than one person in it
(because it is a serious drive away from any of the major towns/cities so one
would assume the cars would be full of people wanting to hit the new, heavily
advertised mall). Do the math people! That many parking stalls
multiplied by the potential two or more persons per car. Goodness that’s
a lot of humans in one place trying to give away their money!
The mall itself? Holy crap. It was kinda cool
and this coming from someone who no longer loves shopping. There was a
lot to look at (the mall AND the people watching) and some of the stores were
not just retail stores, they were experiences). There was a very serious
lack of places to eat. Only two restaurants managed to get their crap
together for the opening weekend and be ready. There was a food
court of course but who wants to stand in line forever to get food just to
realize you will never find an empty table with which to eat. There was
an amazing indoor skateboard park that was very impressive (especially since
the Money Sucker spent almost the entire time skating and not bugging me to buy
him stuff (I call that a win Mall People).
The mall did, however, get so busy that you could barely
walk around without getting bumped by stupid people. There should be
strict rules about stopping dead and using your phone. PULL OVER
PEOPLE. Don’t get me started on how stupid people are with standing in an
open fricken doorway on their phones blocking the entrances! They should
make the mall a no phone zone dammit! So many stupid people.
I did think many, many times while wandering around that I
sure could use a bloody drink and a quiet place to sit down. Just in the
opening weekend alone my martini bar would have made enough money to keep me
living comfortably for quite some time! That and a standing yearly reservation
at the Betty Ford clinic (and maybe Jenny Craig).
