Same Question, Different Words...... Different words, Different Question? You Tell Me.

I was recently asked “What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up?”.  If of course chuckled to myself because I had written a very scattered post with that very same title on February 7^th and, upon reading it back, it occurred to me the key word in that sentence is BE.  I wondered if my post and the question I had been asked should have be worded: “What do you want to DO when you grow up?  One tiny word changes that entire sentence.  Those two words made my February post so much more confusing as the answer to DO would clearly have been “own a craft brewery that serves nachos and write about it” (Please change nachos to Grilled Cheeses.  I changed my mind.  I can do that.)  However, the answer to BE from that post is “Thoughtful, Caring Human”.  Both of which are completely different.  One is a DO and one definitely is a BE.  In my jumbled mind, I had very much confused the two of them.  I now wish I had this epiphany a long, long time ago when I was asked the ever frustrating DO question and I stumbled upon no answer at all.  

I may, from this point on, focus on the BE and not the DO since, it seems, I am a long way from finding the true DO that suits my confusing personality, but I am definitely on my way to being the best BE I can (Yes, my Authentic, Sarcastic Self).  On that note,  I celebrate with those friends who feel they are truly DOING what they love and also celebrate those who live their authentic BE every day. 

Are you the best BE you can be?

(I was going to insert a nature picture of a BEE here but we all know what happens when I post nature pictures so, in order to save time and the hassle, I have decided against any BEE/nature photos at this time.)

A New Chapter

It is always nerve wracking starting something new or making major changes in your life.  In my case, I am the picture of confidence on the outside but inside I am a twirling, nervous mess.  Of course just until the “new” is not new anymore!   This is when I tend to lean on my crew for  reassurance that I am not going to screw up or make a horrible fool out of myself (hence the emergency Back Yard Book Club Meeting that was called!).  So, thus begins a new chapter in my illustrious career.  I am moving from the job that is far, far away to a new job that is much closer in location and, fingers crossed, going to keep the neurons hopping for an extended period of time!  When I am not stressing out about screwing up, I am super excited about the new challenge.  Fingers crossed (again) my new bosses understand sarcasm or I am going to have to a) tone it down a LOT and b) put them on a 12 week sarcasm training course!  All these changes come with the stress/sadness of leaving some of my people (to be fair…. one is leaving me.  Flying off to the desert to have a crazy work adventure).  I will forever be grateful that I got to work Far, Far Away.  I learned that working exclusively out of your home office is not healthy, I hate commuting and I am, apparently, nice to people (don’t tell anyone this… can’t ruin my reputation as a person who dislikes persons!).  I was told a long, long time ago that if you are not uncomfortable, you are not learning.  That’s all fine and good when your 20 years old but sometimes you just want your life to wear yoga pants – even just for a while!  I will, of course, report back on trying to keep my sarcasm at bay and how I am faring at the new job….. Until then in the world according to Shrek – “Change is good Donkey”

FOR THE RECORD.....

In order to squash the rumours I would like to formally indicate here that I have not joined a cult, secret society or radical sect.  I am fine.  Actually even better than fine (thank you very much).   I have also NOT become a Birkenstock wearing environmentalist, an animal activist or a hemp bag toting, no make up wearing, earth loving nut bar.  Please take a deep breath and relax……..  all I am doing is not eating meat.  It is not a big deal.  Millions of people do it.  I am not running off to the hills to grow a damn garden and live off the land.  I am JUST NOT EATING MEAT.  For the most part, people in my life don’t give a shit what I eat.  Some of them are even supportive and dare I say interested.  I have never in my life had to defend my eating choices.  Ever.  Not a single person ever asked me why I ate nachos, French fries and burgers (and I might add here none of those things are actually good for you!).  Having people question my eating of vegetables and other healthy food has been an extreme eye opener.  All I want to really say is that I am eating healthy out of a sheer selfish desire to be healthy (not to mention feel good and not add to my fat cell count and possible plaque hiding in my arteries).  I understand that the word “selfish” is in that sentence and most people find negative connotations with that word.  I understand as well that I may offend some people by this selfish, self-centered  desire to be healthy.  It really is, honestly, a choice that effects NO ONE except me.   On that note, I could see if I suddenly took up smoking…. then if people asked me what the hell I was thinking, I would get it, but meat?  Come on people!  Not only that I by no means push my “no longer eating meat” agenda on anyone!  I am super happy to talk about the new foods I have discovered and how suddenly the previously much hated vegetables taste amazing!    I have a ton of friends who don’t eat seafood, brussel sprouts, mushrooms…. the list goes on, but you don’t see me showing distain towards them because they don’t eat something that I like.  Nor would I harass them about it.  It just doesn’t effing matter.  When people ask me about why I don’t eat meat and am I suddenly weak with protein deficiency all I want to say is “I just don’t want to and really?  Educate yourself about protein!”  but alas I stumble about and try and “defend” myself which is uncomfortable and wrong.   I suppose at the end of the day those who applaud your decisions to be healthy are the ones who really want you to stick around longer than the ones who look at you sideways like you have joined a religious cult. 

This Is What It Has Come To......

This is soon to be the central focus of my wardrobe:

I can dress it up with a fancy necklace and blingy flip flops.  

*This post brought to you by the "after lunch uncomfortables" and or "water retention fun" 

The Last Road Trip

I have officially come to the end of an era.  This past weekend I went on my last sports related road trip with the youngest Money Sucker.  No, it was not bittersweet.  No, I did not relish all that was wonderful about sport road trips.  I did, however, have to remind myself over and over again that the pain and suffering I was going through was for the youngest fella, it was the last official time I would have to participate in the likes of this again AND I could now start spending bundles of money on road trips to places and during times I actually WANT to!  No more really scary motels with substandard cleaning practices.  No more dodgy buffet meals with a pack of idiot teenagers and definitely no long, painful drives to parts unknown with passengers who speak very little human.  Yes, the kid has his road trip memories for which I seriously doubt he will sit back and show appreciation to us for all the time and money spent to attend these memory makers!  I have no wistful feelings of how much I am going to miss these trips because, apart from the odd brewery trip or party with some of the sport parents, I am so ready to close the chapter on this book.  Let the real vacations begin!

Bathing Suit Shopping 2.0

Most women love to shop.  I am saying most because I, once upon a time, would go to the mall with a friend just to look at the new shoes and clothing, maybe grab a coffee and take my time looking at all the wonderful new fashions that came out each season.  I am not sure what happened but I now cannot stand shopping (I am going to blame kids for making shopping trips like a living hell AND for taking all your money).  I will now do hours’ worth of university paper writing, on line research first before I ever get in my car and go to a mall.  No, I don’t order the stuff on line because most of the time, as I have previously mentioned, the stuff looks wonderful on the models on line but when a real human tries the article on it is a scary nightmare (false advertising?).   In spite of all this I had to go out and buy a new bathing suit.  Just typing the words “shopping for a new bathing suit” make me shudder and whimper a little.  This was a necessary trip to the mall that took place just hours before leaving on Girls Weekend and because of this I was willing to go to the Gajillion Dollars for Very Little Fabric Swimsuit Store.  All I really needed, again, was a top that hid my stomach, made my boobs look fantastic (or like I even had any) and made me look super slim.  (PS – I would like a suit that also hides arm fat but that is called a turtle neck and I would have been laughed out of the spa!)  I found many a suit to try on and, after burning off at least a thousand calories and engaging in acts of shoulder dislocation just to get most of them off, I did find a top that covered most of the necessary bits.  The staff at We Will Take Your Gajillion Dollars for Fabric Scraps are extremely helpful and knowledgeable.  I would have been there for hours had I not gotten help.  I leave the shop with not only a bathing suit top but also Fat Hiding bathing suit shorts AND a much, much lighter wallet. 

Side bar – I have always been extremely self-conscious in a bathing suit.  Even before I started drinking craft beer and eating nachos – or had children.  Turns out the ladies at the spa (and even a few dudes) wear whatever the heck they want and let it all hang out.  Apparently it’s all about confidence and, I like to think, seriously not giving a fluff what other people think.  Way to go ladies out there rocking the bikini…… Mad respect!