Yes, a few of you have mentioned my apparent lack of sarcasm lately. It really is a combination of extreme hibernation and utter lack of inspiration. Usually the smallest things make me grab some kind of writing implement to write about but the last month I have not been compelled to see the humor in things. Normally when un-inspiration hits I go into my “posts for editing” or “things that piss me off” folder and I have some story to share but not so much lately. It is seriously time to shake things up. (I might want to mention here that you all have not been sharing your most embarrassing moments for me to post as well, so its partially your fault to!). For now I give you this little service reminder:
Why (Again) You Should NEVER Take Public Transit
So I finally let the people at work know that I am none to impressed with having to get on any form of public transit and, if necessary, I must be given at least two days notice before they expect me to get on any germ infested, smelly death trap known as a public bus or train. I have deftly explained that I must be prepared for said travel and if not given proper prep time, will undoubtedly have to take some “stress” leave to recover from any unprepared, unplanned trip. So in order to avoid the need for meds, my manager gave me two weeks notice that she would like me to attend a meeting at her office. Nice work. Travel prep begins. First and foremost I pretend I do not even have to take the train for the first week, hoping there might be some kind of natural disaster that happens therefore nullifying the whole need for travel in the first place. Natural disaster did not pan out so I had to move onto phase 2. This next stage of planning has me researching the route on line, finding out how much exact change I will need to get on the train and pre-planning the cross shoulder purse, flat shoes (for the get away) and small, undisclosed weapons. Four days before I had the wherewithal to ask my manager about the forthcoming trip whereupon she informed me that I needed to get off the train and get onto ANOTHER train mid way through! (I am figuring this could be why she gave me two weeks notice. I mean really? Two trains? That’s a bit much don’t ya think?) So I write out careful directions about where to get off the first train, where to get on the second train and where the heck to get off to attend this meeting.
The morning arrives and I am prepared. Of course there are things you can never plan for, like people who SMELL and little gangster wannabes who, with their hats pushed sideways, tattoos, earrings and jeans with the crotch down to their knees, talk on their phones like the are all that and a slice of bread, not to mention the odd few who get on the train who look like they haven’t showered in over two weeks and are all shifty eyed and stuff (my manager was clearly lying when she said most of the people on the train were going to be students. Really, why does that student have a plastic bag with all his worldly possessions and look like he hasn’t shaved in two years?) I did however get a very huge reminder about why I hate transit: RUDE PEOPLE! I am still amazed at how rude people can be. At least the only rude person is my car is ME!
