Losing things is just as certain as change. Both
propel us to deal with things that we sometimes do not want to deal with or are
emotionally unprepared to handle. Last week I suffered so many losses I
was beginning to think the Universe was testing my resolve to keep
afloat. Grief is a strange emotion that always seems to follow loss but
how is it possible to move through stages of grief when the losses are numbered?
In my case I tried really hard to just deal with one punch in the face by life
at a time. It was hard work. It is certainly very easy to just curl
up in a ball under the covers in your bed and hide. Or, as many people
do, medicate with alcohol or drugs to not deal at all. As much as all I
wanted to do, for at least a few days, is have myself a pity party and hide
from life, I am not given that privilege. Everyone in my life expects me
to soldier on and maintain their level of comfort so as to not affect their
lives with change or make them have to show any concern. It is also a
personality flaw on my part. I call it one part – don’t like attention,
another part – consistently be a human door mat for people. This
past week has taught me that yes, I can soldier through great losses and
maintain my composure (read: don’t physically hurt anyone or tell people what I
am really thinking) and it has also taught me that the only person I can
trust and rely on is myself. Oh, and don’t get too comfortable because
just when you think your life is rolling along just fine, the Universe decides
to drop kick you back to reality. On that note I leave you
with a picture of Sammy. The cat that was always mistaken for a kitten
who just loved to be warm and never missed an opportunity to help you open a
can of tuna! March 22, 2019
Thoughts on Loss
Losing things is just as certain as change. Both
propel us to deal with things that we sometimes do not want to deal with or are
emotionally unprepared to handle. Last week I suffered so many losses I
was beginning to think the Universe was testing my resolve to keep
afloat. Grief is a strange emotion that always seems to follow loss but
how is it possible to move through stages of grief when the losses are numbered?
In my case I tried really hard to just deal with one punch in the face by life
at a time. It was hard work. It is certainly very easy to just curl
up in a ball under the covers in your bed and hide. Or, as many people
do, medicate with alcohol or drugs to not deal at all. As much as all I
wanted to do, for at least a few days, is have myself a pity party and hide
from life, I am not given that privilege. Everyone in my life expects me
to soldier on and maintain their level of comfort so as to not affect their
lives with change or make them have to show any concern. It is also a
personality flaw on my part. I call it one part – don’t like attention,
another part – consistently be a human door mat for people. This
past week has taught me that yes, I can soldier through great losses and
maintain my composure (read: don’t physically hurt anyone or tell people what I
am really thinking) and it has also taught me that the only person I can
trust and rely on is myself. Oh, and don’t get too comfortable because
just when you think your life is rolling along just fine, the Universe decides
to drop kick you back to reality. On that note I leave you
with a picture of Sammy. The cat that was always mistaken for a kitten
who just loved to be warm and never missed an opportunity to help you open a
can of tuna! 